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Think ‘out of the box’!

“I can’t wear black, as my husband says he does not like this color on me!”

“I won’t cut my hair because my he says he only likes long hair”

“I won’t do a job, as he has objections”

Question:- Get-a-life-ladies! Where is your own self?

“Squeezed it happily to death after marriage, after all I am a loving and faithful wife!”

We live in a confused society.Our lives are centered on social rules as made by our ancestors who made some norms and sentenced them to the coming generations.We live by them even today and worship these dogmas, harping songs of ‘civilization’ and ‘our culture’ and the result is an upside down society where even with the changing times,modernization and the uplift of education, we are still stuck in a web where questioning this setup is rebellion.

A girl in our society is brought up with a stuffed head full of golden ‘tips and tricks’ to lead a successful life in her final destination ‘THE SUSRAL’, where having significant cooking skills is a matter of life and death. She is taught adequate manners, socializing customs and polite communication skills not so that she can be a respectable and good citizen, but because she has to land and serve in “another home”. After all that’s the reason Eva was sent to earth by God!

Any female who turns her face from wearing the crown of being a wife is either a homosexual, or has many boyfriends or simply lacked the spark and oomph to get accepted by anyone in the first place.The sacred institution of marriage is beaten, battered, crushed and crippled to produce a yolk of slavery for both men and women. 220 MEGA VOLT electricity crashed down me, when a girl of my class told me that its their family tradition that after engagement the girl and boy ‘exchange’ net passwords to ensure each others loyalty (As if cheating here is difficult, ever heard of the concealing FAKE ID?). So in order to tighten (and suffocate) the wedlock chain (a relationship that should be based on trust, mutual understanding and confidence) is turned into a detective game and the winner is the one who gets a better hawk eye to catch the culprit. I wonder at times if this is called a wedding or a mere ritual of tying up two animals, declaring each one to be the master of the fate of the other..

“Congratulations for eternal slavery,O! I mean eternal bliss!”

Men obviously still stand on fairer grounds here because they can easily break these rules and do whatever they like as they are the “superior” gender…..sighs!

The standard of an ideal women in our society is the one who dresses according to her hubby’s favorite colors, patiently changes her kid’s diaper, sacrifices her aims or career objectives and is best at pasting dazzling smiles in gatherings. Anyone who fails to do this has committed treason on the expense of our GRAND civilization!

On the contrary, a wife expert at secretly (and without permission) exploring her husband’s mobile in box, files or other personal stuff to keep a check on his activities is doing nothing shallow or wrong, as in our society respecting your spouse’s privacy not a requisite criteria for being a good wife. There is nothing wrong in it as long as you know how to cook the best biryani and Qorma. Who cares about trust, giving other person some space and respect, that’s not included in our standard matrimony dictionary, Thank you!

We never run short of words to kindheartedly criticize the West for destabilizing and ‘not respecting’ the institution of marriage or of lacking “cultural values” of “failed parenthood”, comparing our divorce rate with them to prove we are superior and what not! But do we ever ask ourselves what we ourselves understand of the concept of this relation?

Its time (for heavens sake it REALLY is!). People need to get their ideas straight that matrimony is a mutual relationship where two individuals co-exist on ‘equal’ level (without killing their own or others self), accept and respect each others traits and ideas, believing each other to be their ‘choice’ rather than ‘possession’ , to set the foundation of a sound family which in turn lays the base of a healthy society!

Now I know many of you are rolling eyes…………sour grapes, eh?

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7 thoughts on “Fraility thy name is woman?! I mean Like SERIOUSLY?!

    • uff habiba..CHAAA GAI HO!!! Anth effort..well-written piece…it really worths to be published in some paper…keep writing to get us intoxicated wid your skills.. 😉

  1. Its time (for heavens sake it REALLY is!). People need to get their ideas straight that matrimony is a mutual relationship where two individuals co-exist on ‘equal’ level (without killing their own or others self), accept and respect each others traits and ideas, believing each other to be their ‘choice’ rather than ‘possession’ , to set the foundation of a sound family which in turn lays the base of a healthy society!

    Now I know many of you are rolling eyes…………sour grapes, eh?

    wow friend you are really mature and i like your topic

    habiba zinda bad habiba zinda bad

  2. Hi,myri shadi ko ak saal hu gea.myray susral walu ki demandz he khatam nahe hote aor mujy btyn mujy kyea larna chaheay.byta hny ki b demand.

    • Im really sorry to hear that Shumaila. This typical attitude of ‘susral demands’ is sure very stressing for women. You cannot change your in-laws’ attitude, for this mentality will remain the way it is-sadly. but try to take your husband in confidence, make sure you both have good communication so you can explain him your issues comfortably. If you have your husband’s support then your susral’s irksome attitude will not be as problematic as it might be now. a good husband MUST have the guts to take stand for you if you are subjected to any kind of abuse (may it be psychological). Wish you all the best!!

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